F2P Poems Thread - contribute! :D
- Thread starter Purse
- Start date
Gulbon
Legend
Queue for Gulch or Basin,
With a hefty grin,
On my feral druid,
In the evenin'
Cap the Stables,
Cap the mines,
Whipe at BS,
All the time.
Grab the Flag,
Run the field
Getting Snagged
And you yield.
Lost my grin
It's how it's been
Skill cap lowerin'
With the come of
Pandaren.
Healer wars
Disc Priests too,
Who ever has more
Will screw you.
With a hefty grin,
On my feral druid,
In the evenin'
Cap the Stables,
Cap the mines,
Whipe at BS,
All the time.
Grab the Flag,
Run the field
Getting Snagged
And you yield.
Lost my grin
It's how it's been
Skill cap lowerin'
With the come of
Pandaren.
Healer wars
Disc Priests too,
Who ever has more
Will screw you.
Gulbon
Legend
A F2P Huntard's Story
Wake up in September
Sometime in noon!
Double click WoW!
Can't wait to play soon!
Download the patch
Get ready to hatch
My desires to camp
some noobs.
Log in to F2P
Get ready to
Camp F2Ps
They QQ, well boohoo.
Skillpatched Hunter
BiS too
Expect to ruin fun... derr
S key glued.
What's this, nerfed?
No longer oneshotting.
WSG was my turf
Now I'm just shoddy.
What have you done?
Blizzard, to me?
What have you done?
Might as well roll a disc priest!
Wake up in September
Sometime in noon!
Double click WoW!
Can't wait to play soon!
Download the patch
Get ready to hatch
My desires to camp
some noobs.
Log in to F2P
Get ready to
Camp F2Ps
They QQ, well boohoo.
Skillpatched Hunter
BiS too
Expect to ruin fun... derr
S key glued.
What's this, nerfed?
No longer oneshotting.
WSG was my turf
Now I'm just shoddy.
What have you done?
Blizzard, to me?
What have you done?
Might as well roll a disc priest!
inoobupro
Banned
Why u so concerned about me?
Im a legend status as you can see.
You are a nobody drowning in a sea.
Join my game and prepare to be amazed
i go 71-0 yeah i really run this game
everytime i see someone
I send them to the ground
man this must be a circus
cause you all look like some clowns
yeah im a wow pro
one shotting kids everywhere i go
blizzard ban me because my k/d is too high
they said my skills were superior and made the little kids cry
You randoms cant even keep up with my mad flow
and I just took a huge chunk out of ur wow ego.
Failures at all aspects of you alls life
Even a white dude can cap on your strife.
Just look at the scoreboard im legit
im a wow pro
fans everywhere i go
I only died once and it was from lag and spell reflect
Dem skills be so sharp like barbed wire
so kids sit down and please retire
my kd hits triple digits
you cant patch or stop me
blizzard thought that i was cheating when they saw my huge K/D'e
So do me a favor
get off your seat
Don't know how to end it...
Jk jk I don't act like this anymore, but I think it still got some rhymes in me
Im a legend status as you can see.
You are a nobody drowning in a sea.
Join my game and prepare to be amazed
i go 71-0 yeah i really run this game
everytime i see someone
I send them to the ground
man this must be a circus
cause you all look like some clowns
yeah im a wow pro
one shotting kids everywhere i go
blizzard ban me because my k/d is too high
they said my skills were superior and made the little kids cry
You randoms cant even keep up with my mad flow
and I just took a huge chunk out of ur wow ego.
Failures at all aspects of you alls life
Even a white dude can cap on your strife.
Just look at the scoreboard im legit
im a wow pro
fans everywhere i go
I only died once and it was from lag and spell reflect
Dem skills be so sharp like barbed wire
so kids sit down and please retire
my kd hits triple digits
you cant patch or stop me
blizzard thought that i was cheating when they saw my huge K/D'e
So do me a favor
get off your seat
Don't know how to end it...
Jk jk I don't act like this anymore, but I think it still got some rhymes in me
Goesid
Twink Info Legend
TheBlackGirl
Legend
Twink, twink, little gnome,
How I wonder what you are!
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky.
When the blazing sun is gone,
When nothing shines upon,
Then you show your little light,
Twink, twink, all the night.
How I wonder what you are!
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky.
When the blazing sun is gone,
When nothing shines upon,
Then you show your little light,
Twink, twink, all the night.
Masara
Legend
Hello
I hate to say it, but that really is poetic in its way.
Good to see there was a limerick as well as the other forms, too.
I hate to say it, but that really is poetic in its way.
Good to see there was a limerick as well as the other forms, too.
Srs
Legend
This does not rhyme! Who do you think you are Emily Dickinson?!?
Gethi
Legend
I wanted to have fun
When the BG had just begun
I ran across mid
and looked out for those 24 divs
A 24 Pally, a 24 Spriest
F*** at this rate, I'm gonna have to move to the Middle East
To escape from these fools that be
Disobeyin the rules of the
F2P Community that just wants to get by you see
Without a subscription cos we hatin on Blizz' ways
They been f***ckin us over for
days and a age
What the f*** is happening
You can't even play a mage
It's that kinda sh** that makes me think
Blizzard be inna' haze,
Nerfin the warriors for days
This kinda' sh** would amaze
I don't really know what this rap was,
Lemon Haze
When the BG had just begun
I ran across mid
and looked out for those 24 divs
A 24 Pally, a 24 Spriest
F*** at this rate, I'm gonna have to move to the Middle East
To escape from these fools that be
Disobeyin the rules of the
F2P Community that just wants to get by you see
Without a subscription cos we hatin on Blizz' ways
They been f***ckin us over for
days and a age
What the f*** is happening
You can't even play a mage
It's that kinda sh** that makes me think
Blizzard be inna' haze,
Nerfin the warriors for days
This kinda' sh** would amaze
I don't really know what this rap was,
Lemon Haze
Otto
Legend
Hi and thanks for reading, me being Irish and all if you know history England and Ireland have a bit of a bother with eachother and a republican song was formed called go on home British soldiers. I'll link the lyrics below
(Chorus)
Go on home British soldiers go on home
have you got no fuck'in homes of your own
for eight hundred years we've fought you without fear
and we will fight you for eight hundred more.
If you stay British soldiers if you stay
you'll never ever beat the IRA
the fourteen men in Derry are the last that you will bury
so take a tip and leave us while you may.
(Chorus)
No! we're not British we're not Saxon we're not English
we're Irish! and proud we are to be
so fuck your union jack we want our country back
we want to see old Ireland free once more.
(Chorus)
BREAK
(Chorus)
Well we're fighting British soldiers for the cause
we'll never bow to soldiers because
throughout our history we were born to be free
so get out British soldiers leave us be.
(Chorus X 2)
So I sorta made up my own version after slacknul and Baldi and me got a bit heated about a premade from a certain server with several 24s ( I was on my f2p ) .
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
24's took the gulch in 09
4 shadow priests at a time
In France and Italy
But f2ps didn't flee !
And we'll fight ye for eternity
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
Then the second that MoP hit
On our gy did the spriests sit
farming a couple kills
Probably on the pill !
But today this day we play still !
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
Thanks now before someone says this is an @thread it's not. Just thought it was a bit funny and I should share with you !
Thanks guys
- Otto ( this is just the beginning )
(Chorus)
Go on home British soldiers go on home
have you got no fuck'in homes of your own
for eight hundred years we've fought you without fear
and we will fight you for eight hundred more.
If you stay British soldiers if you stay
you'll never ever beat the IRA
the fourteen men in Derry are the last that you will bury
so take a tip and leave us while you may.
(Chorus)
No! we're not British we're not Saxon we're not English
we're Irish! and proud we are to be
so fuck your union jack we want our country back
we want to see old Ireland free once more.
(Chorus)
BREAK
(Chorus)
Well we're fighting British soldiers for the cause
we'll never bow to soldiers because
throughout our history we were born to be free
so get out British soldiers leave us be.
(Chorus X 2)
So I sorta made up my own version after slacknul and Baldi and me got a bit heated about a premade from a certain server with several 24s ( I was on my f2p ) .
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
24's took the gulch in 09
4 shadow priests at a time
In France and Italy
But f2ps didn't flee !
And we'll fight ye for eternity
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
Then the second that MoP hit
On our gy did the spriests sit
farming a couple kills
Probably on the pill !
But today this day we play still !
Go on home 24s go on home
Have ye got no feckin bracket of yer own ?
For over 2 years we fought you without fears
and we'll fight you forever more.
Thanks now before someone says this is an @thread it's not. Just thought it was a bit funny and I should share with you !
Thanks guys
- Otto ( this is just the beginning )
BingBong
Legend
Love this thread. No idea how I haven't seen it yet.
Limit this to just limerick/haiku and there's so much potential, but here's my typical late morning/early afternoon horde pug perspective in a nutshell:
An undead monk named ßingßong
joined an in-progress Warsong.
He asked, "Why so hard
to leave Horde graveyard?
Those hunters been there all match long?"
Limit this to just limerick/haiku and there's so much potential, but here's my typical late morning/early afternoon horde pug perspective in a nutshell:
An undead monk named ßingßong
joined an in-progress Warsong.
He asked, "Why so hard
to leave Horde graveyard?
Those hunters been there all match long?"
Kawaiipatch
Legend
Goldshire
O sweet Goldshire
Home of Scrubs
And ingame girls that are liars
Sanctuary of Twinks
Always wanna duel
But you gotta wait for their trinks
Come stand on the fence
Infront of the inn
Like a toy soldier on a shelf
Just waiting to be broken in
O sweet Goldshire
Home of Scrubs
And ingame girls that are liars
Sanctuary of Twinks
Always wanna duel
But you gotta wait for their trinks
Come stand on the fence
Infront of the inn
Like a toy soldier on a shelf
Just waiting to be broken in
Bastitch
Legend
The Enormous Clittauris
I roam...
Through the Enormous Clittauris Forest
With my machete
Steadily I behead these mutant crabs because they're deadly
I bet behind that bush there is plenty
Im tired and sweaty
Quitting this expedition is tempting
But the Wise Sage sent me on a mission,
To rescue Princess Incest
On an unblessed quest in my latex armored vest
Im up to the test
But I was barely able, to make it past the navel
The Tale of OpenLipus aint a fable
Across the belly and over titts
Through pits of waste came the Duke of Open Lips
In my mouth a foul taste.......
Many Enormous Clittauris henchmen I had to face
Its a race, against time,
Repeat the words of a Wise Sage in my mind.
Wise Sage:
"The bitch named clit is a problem, you'll have to fix her.
That is why i made you this potentass elixer
When you reach the Enormous Clittauris pour this
I made it for this.
It causes damage equal to four hits with your [War-Prick]
Call me if you need more tips..."
No time to reminisce, for it's
The Enormous Clit's Warcheif, Famous Anus.
But I slayed this, lame kid
Left his corpse with my pipe drainage
Finally at the bitches cave rim
I beat her personal bodyguards, The Apemen,
Hard till they gave in when I came in
The bitch had three tits two clits
And an ass so tight a toothpick wouldnt fit....
Then I drank a potion
To make my mind open
And let the situation soak in
As the beast started approachin'
I threw the Elixer
upon her forehead it was broken
The I Sliced with my [Semen Saber] and said...
"You didnt know this? OpenLipus, the quickest tongue?"
There was a flood of blood
As I punctured her lung with a thrust and a lunge
My [War-Prick] plunged in that bitch's chest
Happy ending at best
Had Princess Incest Bending and yes, as she sung..
I said "OpenLipus, the quickest tongue"
My schlongs flung in rump till it stung with tons of runs between the buns
She said "Your all that"
And she was safe at home playing with my balls and choking up on the bat.
Edit:
ooooooh story art! So illustration.
View attachment 4508
I roam...
Through the Enormous Clittauris Forest
With my machete
Steadily I behead these mutant crabs because they're deadly
I bet behind that bush there is plenty
Im tired and sweaty
Quitting this expedition is tempting
But the Wise Sage sent me on a mission,
To rescue Princess Incest
On an unblessed quest in my latex armored vest
Im up to the test
But I was barely able, to make it past the navel
The Tale of OpenLipus aint a fable
Across the belly and over titts
Through pits of waste came the Duke of Open Lips
In my mouth a foul taste.......
Many Enormous Clittauris henchmen I had to face
Its a race, against time,
Repeat the words of a Wise Sage in my mind.
Wise Sage:
"The bitch named clit is a problem, you'll have to fix her.
That is why i made you this potentass elixer
When you reach the Enormous Clittauris pour this
I made it for this.
It causes damage equal to four hits with your [War-Prick]
Call me if you need more tips..."
No time to reminisce, for it's
The Enormous Clit's Warcheif, Famous Anus.
But I slayed this, lame kid
Left his corpse with my pipe drainage
Finally at the bitches cave rim
I beat her personal bodyguards, The Apemen,
Hard till they gave in when I came in
The bitch had three tits two clits
And an ass so tight a toothpick wouldnt fit....
Then I drank a potion
To make my mind open
And let the situation soak in
As the beast started approachin'
I threw the Elixer
upon her forehead it was broken
The I Sliced with my [Semen Saber] and said...
"You didnt know this? OpenLipus, the quickest tongue?"
There was a flood of blood
As I punctured her lung with a thrust and a lunge
My [War-Prick] plunged in that bitch's chest
Happy ending at best
Had Princess Incest Bending and yes, as she sung..
I said "OpenLipus, the quickest tongue"
My schlongs flung in rump till it stung with tons of runs between the buns
She said "Your all that"
And she was safe at home playing with my balls and choking up on the bat.
Edit:
ooooooh story art! So illustration.
View attachment 4508
Attachments
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Upswag
Legend
Worgen about to cap, swiftness skills ahoy,
But not four realmmates, it's not Ploy!
But he's so close, hearts torn asunder,
But now he's airborne? HB"s thunder!
Kitty grabs the flag, leaps to the totem,
Wow pure skill, that'll show em!
And he's off to the races, our fearless guardian
But what's this? 3 24 rogues were guarding him?
Ambush, Ambush, Ambush, outskilled surely,
But no, 24 rogues can't scroll like Curley,
So Kevi gets the flag, and Jordan jumps midair
Flies backwards, that's that Asian flair
And then Earth Ring AFK's, because they don't care
They just got beat, not fair, not square.*
*Artist rendition of my 3 man beating a 9 man ER premade with 2 jajas. How any guild can be so bad, I don't know.
But not four realmmates, it's not Ploy!
But he's so close, hearts torn asunder,
But now he's airborne? HB"s thunder!
Kitty grabs the flag, leaps to the totem,
Wow pure skill, that'll show em!
And he's off to the races, our fearless guardian
But what's this? 3 24 rogues were guarding him?
Ambush, Ambush, Ambush, outskilled surely,
But no, 24 rogues can't scroll like Curley,
So Kevi gets the flag, and Jordan jumps midair
Flies backwards, that's that Asian flair
And then Earth Ring AFK's, because they don't care
They just got beat, not fair, not square.*
*Artist rendition of my 3 man beating a 9 man ER premade with 2 jajas. How any guild can be so bad, I don't know.