Steve Dong had but one WoW account, but oh, it was a glorious account. It sported a 70 warlock complete with the works. All the gear one could possibly need for any PVP or PVE scenario as a 70 lock (including the grandfathered Zul'Aman items), 5/9 T3 for transmogrification (chest, shoulder, legs, belt, head), Hand of A'dal and the Swift Nether Drake from Season 1 where warlocks totally weren't overpowered. Now Steve, as it came to be, was dismayed at being a bottom of the line class for a whole expansion, and decided to sell his warlock, figuring it would fetch him a handsome amount.
As it were, Steve had his newly dinged 70 mage on the account along with his main, a rogue that had been a level 49 twink during TBC. Add to this the fact that he had 45 alts on different servers with the name "Swingdong" - in case he ever wanted to transfer. Steve was not well pleased with the prospect of parting from his beloved account in its entirety, but that accursed warlock which, despite 700 resilience and Demon Armor, would be dropped in a Cheap Shot by rogues that gemmed crit and didn't have the savvy to spec find Weakness - it had to go!
Now, this was somewhat of a dilemma for Steve - what was the poor guy to do? He sought the help a learned priest in his guild, one most knowledgeable about matters of account- and character management. The shaman said to him: "Verily, I say unto thee, thou shalt take thine account and make another in its image. And on the sabbath, request thou a transfer of thy sweet twink from ye account of old. Fast thou three days, for that is the time prescribed by thine LORD and savior, Blizzard Entertainment. And if thou be a righteous man, who hath sacrificed seven goats, bask thee in the blessings of the LORD, knowing that truly, thou hast two accounts of great reputability." And he did as the priest bid him, creating a separate account under the name Steve Dong, and transferring his warlock to it.
His pimped lock quickly found its way to a buyer. The priest had offered him the advice to sell it without a middleman, thus ensuring him a larger share of the price and enabling him to take back the account any time he wished. The buyer, ignorant of this fact, paid more than Steve had hoped (the Haunted Memento on the warlock has significantly enticed this particular buyer). This buyer, one by the name of Kim Tea, was in the unfortunate situation of still wanting to play his own account alongside his newly acquired warlock. He wondered to himself if perhaps there was some way to unite this new twink under the same account as his other characters. The warlock being on an account named "Steve Dong" and his own bearing the name "Kim Tea", this seemed quite the obstruction. He sought the advice of the one in which he had put his faith.
"Lord Blizz, I beseech thee, for I am in my hour of need. Wilst thou mergeth mine two accounts? Verily, I say, verily they are in good standing with thine Arch-GM Gabriel, and hast no record of sin." As he awaited a reply, he trembled. He could not know what this being, who created the World (of Warcraft), was capable of. "Petty subscriber! Bow down to your LORD! Thine plea has reached my ears, and a response I afford thee after 6-8 weeks. As it was commanded in times of old, when the blood of the Midianites was yet spilt on the Mount of Blackrock, thou shalt not have strange accounts before me! Do not lie with a strange account as with your own, for it is an abomination!" Kim knew he was powerless in face of The Almighty, and decided to take the sour with the sweet, paying the monthly subscription for both accounts and logging onto them separately. Amen.