I absolutely cannot wait to read your thesis once finished. Please submit the final version like: John “Deeznuts” Doe. I believe most twink’s “Twink” for a variety of reasons.
In original WOW twinking was something that the majority couldn’t achieve due to lack of funding or time. Sure you could throw together some shitter with substandard gear/enchants a fink(failed twink), but you quickly realized your half assed attempt didn’t cut it in the Gulch. Time and time again you were deleted by these mystical gods who ruled the battlefield.
One of three things happened, you either typed DELETE and only thought about those days laying on the couch in your therapist’s office.
The second group of flinks adapted to the situation, they used gorilla warfare. They acknowledged being outmatched and used hit and run techniques instead focusing on weaker targets allowing a feeling of contribution despite the facts.
I believe the twinkers you are talking about is largely from this group. You can easily spot these weaker flinks today, they enter a BG and take deserter buff immediately when a free win is not promised. They love to name drop all the greats they once feared or pretend they played with them in the past because they got random qued in a few BG’s with them. Their need for validation is the only driving force behind them because they have never experienced the satisfaction of defeating other apex predators on the battlefield.
They often pretend that (insert random expansion) twinks or twinking on a private server was somehow remotely equatable to real OG twinks. Once classic was announced they knew this was their shot at redemption/greatness.
Finally Classic launched, obviously they had no choice but to roll horde not only for the superior PVP benefits but could you imagine achieving some of the best items in game which are only attainable in the open world as the outnumbered faction? Absolutely not, they chose dumb names like zanger or twinkxxxx and sat quietly in their basement buying all the best BOE’s counting down the days till Battlegrounds launched.
Finally BG’s launch, their entire life has led to this moment but something horrible happened. Running across the field once the gates lifted their premade stays together in tight formation towards the alliance side to snatch that flag nothing would stop them. That’s when they noticed the level 10 alliance hunter running out the tunnel all alone. It was a swift vicious death for the hunter, quickly they celebrate the victory some danced on his corpse while others quickly alternated between sitting and standing on his face. They all KEK’d though in chat as is tradition on the battlefield when killing a solo as part of a group.
The death machine move onward towards the alliance flag room, the silly lvl 10 hunter was no match again for such experienced predators. Their Druid quickly grabs the alliance flag because his name has flag in it so that makes sense but what happens next does not. During the celebration and KEK’S over the dead lvl 10 hunter for the second time the cleverly named Druid had left the majority of his team behind utilizing the speed buff followed by the use of a swiftness potion.
Much like our poor lvl 10 hunter friend this Druid stood no chance against the full enemy team escorting their flag carrier. Alliance flag has been returned, luckily half the horde were still finishing up said KEK’S and alternating between sitting and standing quickly in the alliance flag room.
It was to late though, somehow the alliance must have caught them off guard and wiped the remaining horde. 0-1! That’s ok they thought our Druid must just be named that way as a meme so we will just have someone else carry. We know our gear is leet, we have all the pieces we used to dream about back in the day so that alone will carry us to victory.
This time our teams clash in middle, something is wrong however. Maybe keybinds and macros don’t work in the gulch. We should be one shoting these Ali scum they complained, we are decked out with BIS Gear with max enchants. We have the OP racials, names and that one guy who was a filler that one time on an OG squad.
0-2
WTF is happening someone asks in /bg
The group waited outside the graveyard for the rest of the team to spawn. Mathlete the rogue noticed the lvl 10 hunter outside their healing hut all alone again. He’s mine he quickly proclaimed. Due to game mechanics however horde are not allowed to 1v1 under any circumstances Beefbitch the Tauren BG leader reminded them. They quickly discussed the best way to attack him once they had all spawned.
Flagfail has left the battleground.
Zanger has left the battleground.
OrcHunter has left the battleground.
It’s ok we can come back they thought maybe those guys had bad ping that would explain our situation. Those three were quickly replaced and it’s 10v10 again. The group of horde moved as one leaving the graveyard. Half would go left around the hut and he rest would block any escape from the other side.
The exceptional shot calling worked, the lvl 10 hunter was quickly dispatched.
Alliance Wins WTF??? Wut?
After blaming each other and replacing slots in their team they qued up again.
0-3
0-3
0-3
At this point the few left in the party had no one left to blame so they all agreed they would work on recruiting more twinks tomorrow.
A few tried forming new twink guilds and enjoyed all the matches against non-twinks. That started the chemical reaction, horde kill shitters, horde feel good. Just like a drug your body eventually needs more to release those endorphins and in stressful situations your body craves those endorphins.
Finally they had matched against a full premade. Having killed thousands of low level or solo twinks over the week this was the moment they had been training for.
0-1
0-2
0-3
Quickly and quietly one by one they logged off. I wasn’t there so I don’t know all the details. It’s said a few of those horde haven’t logged on since that night. Some probably rerolled Ali and unfortunately some probably succumbed to their depression ultimately killing them selves after seeing that they would never taste success.
So with twink gear so easily available that doesn’t provide a free win like they hoped, the racials, names and sacred battle celebrations utilized didn’t work either. Dumb Name Horde Twink guild disbanded that night.
The only survivors at this point were the exact twinks you asked about initially. Watching fellow teammates cancel subscriptions and or life took its toll.
They are the equivalent of a crack whore sucking dick for a fix. The cost doesn’t matter, just a few minutes of release is worth anything. Yeah Graveyard camping is a waste of time for many reasons but just like the crack whore they get shit on by life, premades, and probably anything in life they ever attempt.
To outsiders it’s mind boggling but they will do anything to just have a taste.
That fist high won’t ever be achievable again, there aren’t any other options though eventually you will get matched with a premade where there are no KEK’S , no fast paced sitting and standing on corpses. The only option they have is to sit in graveyard and take that metaphorical dick. Sure graveyard camping is silly to us but just that little release they get from it helps numb out the pain of constant dicks they are forced to take most other games.
The last group of twinks you almost never see. If matched against them you most likely left before the battle began or if you stuck it out the match was over before you knew it.
They don’t post on forums complaining about this or that, they don’t create a lvl 1 on your server to talk shit. They aren’t posting screenshots of lopsided wins to boost their ego. You won’t find them crying about being graveyard camped because even if they are running solo with 9 other low levels they are going to try everything they can and when the inevitable happens you would never know just talking to them after match in discord for example because truly great twinks are unaffected by wins/losses unless it’s a evenly matched game.
Every other game is just training for that moment you do get those even games. They will casually wave while your premade sits in gy wondering what the fuck just happened.
Most games the enemy’s will not leave their graveyard after first cap. I don’t often run flags or practice jumps so I will just wave at the team up in their graveyard. This is a friendly gesture, we both understand what is happening here. It’s just business really we are here for the win, it’s fine if you wave the white flag I completely understand.
Let my team come to do what we do and we all get out of here sooner. However we are not friends, don’t try and leave your graveyard because that tells me you don’t understand, do not send your pets on me down below.
You are free to /wave /shrug /cry or any other passive emotes. There is no need for /spit or anything like that though if you don’t want to be treated like a bitch don’t act like one.
Sorry it’s so long I just figured I would give you something to read while waiting on Rez timers.
